Time Slips Away...

When I was a child, I remember thinking how far away adulthood stood. It was like a wish that got caught on a breeze and was just out of reach...

Now I am an adult and everyday passes so quickly. I look at my children and see them growing so fast, it hurts to know that it will seem like I blinked and they are moving on into their own adulthood.

So much has happened this week. My mother was released from the hospital, then had to return 24 hours later; I had obligations galore, and felt swamped most of my waking hours...some of my asleep hours were spent dreaming about how much I had to do!

Now, I sit down to reflect and realize that my daughter is turning one year older, she will be nine years old on Sunday and that is the halfway point to her going away to college. That realization just put a stone in my stomach and froze my heart.

Of course, I will remain my "sensible" self and focus on the fact that I have so many moments with her in the future...so many life experiences to share and treasure.

Why does time have to be so slippery?

Mother vs. Cat

My mother has never been very good. I don't mean in the way that she will go to hell and not heaven - although she certainly will be heading south - it's more that she was never much of a mom to me...the good never made up for the bad.

So when she told me today, that I had to "get rid of the cat" - the cat my husband and I named "Babies" because we consider her our first child - I actually had to think about whether she meant enough to me to do this...to "get rid of MY cat".

In the end I rationalized that people are more valuable, worth more, than animals...and it helped that my wonderful mother-in-law (this woman is more of a mother to me than my own has ever been!) said she would take the cat.

Are people inherently more valuable than pets? Even bad people? I really don't think so. I think I was kidding myself. I think I'm going to regret choosing my mom over my cat.

It Begins

Today it begins. I will write my thoughts, reflections, and feelings into a blog. I've joined the 21st century. We will see if this helps or hurts, but I will focus on the things that matter most to me. These ideas and emotions might be too strong to willingly read at times...that is alright, this is for me; and if someone is helped by reading what I post here...than so be it.

At times I will wax philosophical and at other times I will simply scream out my frustrations with life. Good luck to me!