NaNoWriMo

I've decided to participate in The National Novel Writing Month, and I can't even fill out the "novel" page!  What's my title? I DON'T KNOW! What's my genre? I DON'T KNOW! UGH!

For any of you that read my flash fiction piece for the Campaign - if not see below - this is the basis for my novel.  Any ideas of a genre?  I need help!  It's obviously for adults, because there is tons of cursing and my MC will be in her early 20's; there will be no supernatural elements and it deals with her own definition of spirituality, as well as her getting revenge on a ton of really bad guys..."Mystery, Thriller, Suspense"?  There really isn't a mystery involved...

I must seem really pathetic, huh?  I can't even decide what genre I'm writing!  They also have "Mainstream Fiction" - what is that??  God, I'm really clueless.  I don't pay attention when I read a book, I buy it and I read it and I never think about where it "fits" into the book publishing world.

Well, here's the flash piece my novel is based on...

You Shouldn't Scream

The door swung open and the waves of heat brought the flies. 

I can smell the stink of rotting flesh, and I pray it isn't my leg; perhaps just a rat caught in the trap under the camper.

"What the hell took you so long?" I screamed, I should not have screamed. 

Now look at me, I'm stuck and don't know what I'm going to do without him.  What the fuck kind of person just up and leaves after doing this?  I'm here because of him, if I had a phone I'd call for help; but I'm stuck in Nowheresville with no electricity, plumbing or cell coverage.  It's got to be almost midnight and I'm an idiot.

What is that scratching?  What is outside?  I've got to check my leg, but I'm scared of what I'll see.  At least it's a full moon, that'll help me clean up this mess.

"OK...I can do this...OH SHIT!"

To be fair, I did not expect the maggots...I think the puking is justifiable.

Fuck! I've got to get out of here. 

I can hear breathing; no, it is SNIFFING!

Please! Not a coyote.  The fucker's tail hit the broom and the door swung shut.
_________________________________________________________________

Let me know if you have any ideas!
Thanks, dear readers!

Third Campaigner Challenge

Life has been difficult, and I almost missed this...here's my entry!

The lavender sky hints at warmth, maybe.  The sun might decide to burn through the June gloom, but I doubt it - the lavender will give way to gun-metal gray and stay that way till the sun decides to peek through the cloud cover on his way to bed, maybe then a nice sliver of red.  The air smells damp and moldy, I hate that smell.  My lips are dry; I'm so out of shape - ugh salt.  Why do I walk down here every morning?  My nipples are already at home they're sticking out so far.  I hate sand, I hate the way the sand sticks to everything and chafes; and I really hate that goddamn slime ball staring at my tits.  Everyone assumes you like to surf and frolic like Gidget; but I really hate everything to do with this damn place - so what if I was born here?  I suppose I should sit here and meditate for a while - get into my "zen zone"; but what's the point?  My deep breaths will give way to snores because I'm NOT in the right mindset.

What the hell is that?  AAACK!  Nothing like a good dry heave in the morning.  I hate how the wind changes on a dime, and brings god knows what to unsuspecting nostrils.  Dead fish is one thing, but that is nasty - rotten body odor and...opium den?  Seriously, where is that coming from?  Up on the dunes?  God I hate this chug - up, up, up...it seems never-ending.  Up, up, up...did I mention I hate sand?  Holy shit!  Are those legs?  The buzzing finally registers, the buzzing...Oh! Fuck! Thousands of bees just noticed me, and I'm too close for comfort...I'm going to die, I don't have my EPI pen!

Hope you enjoyed this, I'm number 129 and you can "like" me by clicking HERE

Scapegoat

Why is it that human beings (American's more than any other society) seem to struggle with taking responsibility for their own faults and actions?  I know that there are people out there with the integrity to stand up and say, "Yeah, I messed up and I'm sorry"; but they are so few and far between - they get profiled in "Hero" stories on 20/20 or other shows.  These characteristics seem non-existent in the workplace anymore, and it is wrong that we as a society seem "ok" with this behavior.

What happened to standing up for what is right?  What happened to saying "I'm sorry"?  What happened to learning that responsibility, integrity, honesty, and hard work will pay off over lying, manipulation, conniving, and back-stabbing?

Oh, that's right...I remember...the 80's, Reaganomics, cocaine, Wall Street...that's what happened.

I'm bitter and pissed right now, my husband was used as a scape goat for the "#2" at his job on Friday and is now out of a job.  My husband is one of the good ones, and anyone that has worked with him knows it - he should NOT have been the fall guy; but he was and now we have to deal with it.

I utterly loathe rich, lazy, liars that don't care about loyalty or honesty and have no integrity.  I wish we could zap them all out of existence.

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

I've got so much to say!  So many ideas are bouncing around in my head (not to mention what the voices have on their agenda!), and I have no time to sit down and write them down.  I'm seriously bummed right now.  I feel guilty for not posting and I feel even more guilty that I haven't had time to sit and read all my favorite blogs!

My daughter's first archery tournament is this Saturday.  

We have been living and breathing archery the past week in preparation and as a result, Mommy has neglected her writing.  Why is it that moms always sacrifice themselves/their dreams/their hopes for the children?  Oh, I'm feeling it right now.

So I have to make some changes because I hold myself to unrealistic goals sometimes and I've come to view the blogging and reading of the blogs as an obligation that I have NO TIME to accomplish.  Realistically, I do have the time - maybe not every day, maybe not every other day; but I have to stop being ridiculous in the expectations department.  If I post a couple times a week, the readers will understand and be supportive...right?

So I'm making some changes...

I've decided to post regularly only twice a week.  I've got too much going on right now for a bigger commitment and I want to keep to a schedule that is manageable.  This way, I won't feel guilty about the days I miss, and I can focus on reading all the wonderful blogs I can't read now...

Fundraising Sucks

I have 3 children, two are in school and one is a Girl Scout.  Our family has a lot of fundraisers, and we hit up our friends and family 3 or 4 times a year...and I've decided it sucks.

I love that my daughter is fundraising with her Girl Scout Troop to do amazing things: they use their proceeds to buy shoes and bus passes for homeless children in Long Beach, CA.  However, I hate the process, I hate that she is constantly asking for people to buy things from her.

Now my son is in Kindergarten and the school has a fundraiser and so he is asking people to buy things! 

When did it become ok to have our children use their cute faces to sell crap?

Note: I didn't sleep last night, and I'm writing this after listening to my children argue about who has sold more stuff - and with no coffee on board yet...I'm a bit pissed and bitter.

Disclosing the Ghost

So my sis-in-law, Liz, has been telling me that I should do a blog post entitled "Disclosing the Ghost" - so here it is! :)

As those of you that have been reading for the last week or so know...my previous abode was haunted.  While we were trying to sell the damn place, things got pretty crazy and so I asked my realtor; "Do I have to tell the buyers that this place is haunted?"  Guess what her reply was...she didn't look at me like I was crazy, she didn't ask me why I was asking...she simply said, "well, did the person die IN the house?"  My jaw hit the floor.

That is how all of these movies where the family buys their "dream" home and then get killed by the malevolent spirits are plausible!  No one told them a family had been murdered in the front lawn - they didn't have to!  Or better yet, an entire family is killed IN the house?  Tear it down and build a new house ON THE SAME LAND!  You won't have a problem selling it because you DO NOT have to disclose it!

So it probably behooves all of us looking to purchase a home, to go to the library and search old newspaper articles for the heinous crime that was committed in our "dream" home; or in my case - the crazy old fools that lived there but died in a nursing home down the street.

The Weekend

The weekend has arrived.
The past week has been hard.
The times I had to think, few and far between.
The demands of me, overwhelming.

I go into these two days desiring peace.
I go forward expecting war.

The two days are short.
The mornings are my only time.
The hour before others awake, I sit and stare.
The pages remain empty, mocking.

The Poltergeist in My House and Other Remembrances of My Nana...

I grew up surrounded by a type of warfare, a dichotomy of spirituality vs. RELIGION.  My grandmother taking me out to the woods, anointing my body with fragrant oils so that we could dance naked under the full moon and celebrate our Goddess blessed bodies; my grandfather taking me to the Baptist church on Sunday morning, Sunday night, Tuesday choir practice, Wednesday Bible Study, Thursday choir practice, and Saturday Service.

My grandmother was an old school witch.  She believed that all of us have power and should worship Mother Earth, because it is our Mother that gives us all good things.

My grandfather was a career Navy man, saved in the midst of a war; afraid he could never be pious enough to cancel out all the mean things he did to his children, women he cheated on my grandmother with, cursing, smoking, drinking, and other unmentionable atrocities.

So who do you think won that war?

My grandmother was not all rainbows and butterflies, she practiced a dark blood magic that came from the old world and was capable of doing some really heinous things.  She told me when I was 16 that she had done a blood binding spell to our house, because she knew her family would always own it and she wanted to be sure she stayed with her family - she had no desire to cross into "some ridiculous, happy light". 

Fast forward to 2009, my grandmother died on February 20th of that year; after a long battle with Alzheimer's and the lights in our house (my husband and I had "saved" my grandparents house from being condemned years earlier - but that is another story) began to flicker.

Strange electrical happenings began to happen more and more frequently, with more intensity, after my husband got laid off and then had his salary cut when he was brought back - we were talking about selling the house.

When we officially listed the property, the "haunting" became ridiculous.  Our ceiling fans would turn on - with the power switch off, my youngest son's talking dog toy began saying things - when it was off, with batteries removed - that was not in its programming, and my children would come to breakfast exhausted because Nana had been talking to them all night and they didn't get any sleep.  I was at my wits end.

Our first Open House was successful, we got an offer.  Something happened then, the buyers suddenly became worried and upset about buying the house and pulled their offer.  Months went by, we were financially becoming more and more crippled - we needed to get out of this monstrosity of a house before our financial situation was too bad to recover from.

The "vibe" in the house was getting worse, so I called a medium.  I asked if she could do an exorcism on the house and property.  I told her about the blood binding spell.  She said she could come over and take a walk through the house and feel it out. 

She arrived and everything happened on cue, it was as if my Nana was taunting her - saying "Look at me! Look at what I can do!"  The medium was more than a bit creeped out.  She got to work, she was blessing and expelling and burning things and lighting candles...it felt and looked very powerful.

That night, the house was quiet and peaceful.  My children slept their first night's sleep in months, the lights didn't come on, and there were no possessed toys talking to us.  It was fantastic!

Our house sold the next day.

Checking in...

Well, I haven't posted since my birthday.  Oh! What a birthday it was!  Dinner at the SUPER-romantic, historical Sky Room and a movie with my wonderful hubby...who could ask for anything more? :D

It is funny how crazy busy you become, whenever you don't want to be and have been actively trying to UN-drama your life.  Has anyone else experienced this?  Between archery, Girl Scouts, school activities, homework, fundraising, community service and all the other stuff - I'm wiped out.

In addition, I've been lagging on my writing.  When the kids finally go to sleep (usually the youngest is down by 11pm, at the latest); I find I'm exhausted and often just sit and stare until I can no longer keep my eyes open - then trudge off to bed.  Kinda sad, right?

Well, I've made a commitment to get my first novel done in the next year - deadline: July 31, 2012.  I figure it's an apropos date since it's LIZ's birthday and she really got me going with the blogging! 

So let the countdown begin!  Now I can no longer make excuses and have to write even when I'm tired.  Deadlines (even the ones I put on myself) keep me motivated, how about you?  What keeps you writing even when you are tired/sick/stressed/overwhelmed?  Do any of you struggle with this?

Happy writing and thanks for reading!